In Business & In Life: Part I

I don't have many 'pet peeves.' Okay maybe a few. I can't stand when people continue talking on their cell phone when they're checking out at a register. And I am not a giant fan of huge exhales done in my general direction. That's only because I don't love germs. Not because I am anti-people doing what they need to do to de-stress.

However, I have one issue that I was shouting from the roof tops as a new pet peeve: Accountability. I firmly believe in taking accountability for yourself, and your actions....in business, and in life. 

I watched my son the other day with a group of about 15 other kids. They all had to make a basket in order to move to the next round in a group scavenger hunt. When it was my son's turn, he told all the kids to back up and he stepped far further away from the hoop than they had been and said, 'I got this.' I almost stepped in and whispered in his ear, 'hey, don't be boastful. Get closer and don't hold up the group.' But I didn't. He missed the shot. He didn't flinch. He ran up with the ball, sunk a lay-up, and they all moved on.

He had no fear of failure and I had a moment of pause.

The dude. May he never lose the confidence to dance wherever, whenever he feels the beat!

Perhaps that's why accountability seems absent sometimes. Not because people are just asses, but because people don't want to admit failure. Or a mis-step. Or anything less than perfect. The realization shifted my annoyance at this 'lack of accountability issue' to a sense of sympathy for it. Perhaps we just can't accept not having done something perfectly in our fast-paced, high-expectations, high-achieving, bigger is better, society.

And I get it. I'm competitive (with others and with myself). And in general, I don't love to do things I'm not good (read: GREAT) at. I also believe in setting performance standards for ourselves and trying really damn hard to meet them.

But, I also realize that accepting accountability for my imperfections or occasional 'errors' makes things a whole lot easier....again, in business and in life. I've found that by accepting accountability, you give others permission to let their guard down. You show others you're honest and humble and human and that they can be too. You keep relationships strong because you're not unjustly pointing fingers or blame-shifting at someone else's expense. You decrease pressure and sometimes more people than you will benefit from that.

I believe taking accountability makes me a stronger colleague and leader. And I believe my best Client relationships are with those willing to say 'oh shit, I realize I'm completely changing directions here and didn't get back to you for 3 days so we'll need more time. Not your fault.'

I believe it also makes me a stronger parent because I've learned that sometimes I need to be the one apologizing to my child. I think it's okay, and healthy, to sometimes just say, 'I'm sorry I got on your case for putting on your shoes too slow....Mommy is just a little nervous about something at work, but you didn't deserve that tone.' Life is not perfect.

When I was younger and starting my first job, I would come home so worried at night, to the apartment I shared with my sister. It sounds so simple but she'd always tell me 'Sarah....as long as you do your best, that is all you can do.'

So let's all just keep doing our best...and taking accountability...and moving on when our best doesn't always work out just so.

My sister Stephanie and I, doing what we spent far more than half of our childhood doing.

Before I go, I'll also pass this little diddy on.

I saw a quote online the other from Steve Maraboli that I really, really liked:

"...she doesn't have to choose between being gentle or being fierce. Both exist in nature and both exist in her. That's okay. She'll know to nourish them both and when applicable, use each unapologetically."

I know this isn't rocket science...but I hope this post allows for a collective sigh of relief of sorts. A Hell Yeah, I'm doing my best, and it's totally okay if I screw up from time to time. 

Blue Skies and Best,

Sarah